Tag Archives: Man Utd

10 (actually 11) really crap (outfield) football kits from the 90’s

Yes I know, it’s been done before by almost every blogger that mentions football or fashion in their blog, I realise what I’m doing is not new, it’s not original but screw it, I’ve had absolutely sod all to write about of late so I need a few buffer pieces to try and keep all 3 of my regular readers entertained for 30 seconds before they get bored of my inane moaning.

Anyway, the 90’s, the decade that saw the end of the Tory reign in Britain (until recent), the birth of the Premier League, Football Italia on Channel 4, being mega because you had a Berghaus coat on, boss Kickers Jumpers that you could show off in on Mufti day to name but a few brilliant things that happened in the 90’s. It wasn’t all great though. The Peter Johnson years at Everton, jarge Puma discs trainees, Adidas popper pants, Eclipse “Acid face smiley” tshirts, fashion in the 90’s was a bit jarge and it wasn’t just in the streets, it “graced” our football pitches. So without further here are 10 REALLY crap football kits from the 90’s

#10 – Stoke City’s 1992/3 Away Kit

The ECG on Acid kit

I can’t even….what is going on here? I’m thinking ECG graph on acid maybe? I know acid house was big in the early 90’s but this thing is just ridiculous.

#9 – Australian National team 1991 home Kit

Aloha!

I had a conversation with my Australian friend recently and she asked the question “Why don’t people ever seem to take us Aussies seriously?” and here is the answer. Look at it, just look at it, that’s not a football kit, it’s a friggen Hawaiian shirt or a costume from Scarface, absolutely ridiculous.

#8 – Chelsea away kit 1996/7

The broken television kit

Once upon a time Chelsea weren’t just a really shit club, they also had a really shit away kit. Combining a strange blend of orange with that grey static pattern that you get on your telly when it’s being a pain in the arse. Look what that static design has done to Ol’ Sparky’s bonce.

#7- Everton 92/93 Away Kit

It's "Salmon"

Urgh, I didn’t want to have to do this but my god me and almost every sensible Evertonian out there HATED this kit. The “salmon” (BOLLOCKS IT WAS PINK) and navy striped joke was only the beginning of crap away kits at EFC. We repeated the “Salmon” thing again in 2001 and then went and released that baby pink monstrosity last season as well. For the love of God Everton, STOP!!

#6 – Birmingham City Home 92/93

The 80's wallpaper look AND matching Shorts

Look it’s Paul Holmes, one of the worst players to wear an Everton shirt wearing one of the worst football kit’s ever designed. I’m sure this was the design my uncle had for his wallpaper when he was still living at home, and them shorts…brilliant, and to think this was a HOME kit as well HA!

#5-  Manchester Utd 95/96 away kit

Even Fergie hated this thing

Remember this bad boy? Even Sir Alex hated this barbaric sight for sore eyes. According to him this kit was solely responsible for Man Utd going down 3-0 at half time at The Dell in Southampton. I always remember Ol’ Whiskey nose himself saying that the players couldn’t see each other because the kit “blended” into the crowd and ordered the side to change to their alternative 3rd kit at half time. Not being funny but if anyone in the crowd was the same colour as this shirt I’d be worried about them and recommend they get to a doctor as soon as possible.

#4 – Liverpool away kit 96/97

Ec..what?

Now before any Reds come on here kicking off calling me “bitter” have a little look up to #7 before winging ok. Anyway, apparently this was “ecru” coloured whatever that is. To me this is what the aftermath of a school shirt looked like after ya ma gives up on trying to clean it cos you keept playing football in park after school in it. That or the head on a pint of Guiness. I always remember ripping my mate in school for wearing this for P.E, he still insists that it was the best away kit ever released to this day, he is still an idiot.

#3 Arsenal 91/92 Away kit

The Bruised banana

Yellow was the standard away colour for Arsenal for years and still remains their regular away colour, but this thing, good god, it’s awful. It just looks simply like a bruised banana and what was worse is they occasionally had to wear it with Yellow shorts too.

#2 Norwich 92/93 Home Kit

 

Canary Shit

This is what I imagine a yellow tshirt would look like after leaving it at the bottom of a bird cage for 24 hours. Ironic, that the Canaries would wear a shirt that looks like a canary has shit all over it, awful.

#1 Hull City 92/93 & 93/94 Home Kits.

They're not so GREEEATTT

A bit of a double whammy featuring the same club in consecutive years. I know Hull City’s nickname is the “The Tigers” but seriously, this thing just takes the complete piss. I’d like to think even the kids of Hull didn’t show up to school on a mufti dressed in this Tony the Tiger monstrosity, however they are from Hull and I have been wrong before. What’s worse is that the club didn’t learn their lesson from this utter joke and released this THING the following season –

Dean Windass doing his best Peter Stringfellow impression

 

So there you have 10 (well actually 11) really crap football kits from the 90’s. Sorry for putting your eyes through this gallery of monstrosities I will try and get back to doing “normal” writing as soon as something worthwhile comes along to write about.

If by now you haven’t had the urge to rip your retinas out with a blunt object then please feel free to “Google” any of the following crap kits from the 90’s, in the list below, that unfortunately never made the cut this time. Who know’s there may be a Crap Kit #2 in the near future, with the lack of “proper” subject matter to discuss at the moment that may be sooner rather than later, I hope not though.

Other crap kits –

*Aston Villas “green and black stripe thing” away kit 1993-95

*Man Utd’s “Blue snowflake thing” away kit 1991-92

*Brighton & Hove Albions “Red and white roadkill” away kit 1991-92

*Leeds Utd “Streaky blue, yellowy green thing” 3rd kit 1991/92

*Kansas City Wizards “Gay rainbow” 1997/98 Home kit

*Liverpool’s “Snot green” 1991-93 away kit

*Shimuzu S-Plus “Orange thing” 1992-94 Home kit

*Blackpool’s “Wacky Blue Argyle thing” 1997-98 Away kit

Big thanks to Diz Wright and Kris Baughan for their “crap kit” contributions on Facebook, Nice one lads. Any other suggestions? Chuck them my way.

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Filed under Clobber, General

Everton’s “The Double” Season 85 Archive Footage

Despite supporting my beloved Blues for almost 21 years now I’ve unfortunately never seen any great glory come to Goodison in my life time. A fantastic FA Cup win followed by Charity Shield win in 95 is the best I’ve seen, not bad granted, but without doubt Everton’s finest years were unfortunately before my time and without any question one of, if not the greatest season was that of Everton’s 1984/85 “Double” Season. The year before I was born Everton managed to win both the league and the European Cup Winners Cup as well as making it to the FA Cup final which unfortunately slipped away from us when a Norman Whiteside goal secured the cup for Man Utd that season.

Despite seeing plenty of footage of the great “double” season in the past somebody has finally put together a huge compilation of archive footage from most of Everton’s wins and goals from that famous season which include footage from the famous 5-0 drubbing of Utd at Goodison, THAT goal from Sharpy, the Bayern Munich semi final and the Rapid Vienna final as well as some of the less known/documented wins from the Blues that season. My friend Ped from Followtonians put this up on Facebook the other day so I felt I’d share with any fellow Blues who read this blog. SO sit back, relax, reminisce and remember it wasn’t all doom and gloom once.

PLEASE NOTE: I do not own the copyright of these videos, I am simply sharing them, they will be removed at request of copyright owner ONLY via email.

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Filed under Cup Football, Everton

Everton 0 – 1 Man Utd

Loosing to a team like Utd is a bit of a write off these days unless your a team like City or Chelsea however Everton walked away from the match on Saturday without their pride being completely knocked in my opinion. Had it not been for a poor defensive mistake in the 17th minute that lead to Utd’s only goal I do strongly believe that Everton could have walked away from the game with at least a point, if not all three.

Couldn’t get to the game on Saturday myself but I did head over to my local to watch it on the telly with a few glasses of coke due to the hangover and the fact it was a midday kick off and despite the result it was a good match to watch. You would of thought that after the embarrassing thrashing Utd received last week and the fact that Everton had six players on the pitch that had played 120 minutes of football less that 72 hours before kick off and were missing Cahill, Drenthe and Distin that Man Utd would be set to cruise this, however this wasn’t the case. It was Everton who made the brighter start when Seamus Coleman came close after just 30 seconds which led to Everton piling on the pressure. Unfortunately though it was Utd that struck the only goal in the game after a poor bit of defending allowed Hernandez or Chicarito or whatever the meffs name is to tap in from point blank range from a cross on 17 minutes. You could tell straight away this deflated Everton and Utd started to put on the pressure. Everton tried the best to push but constant mistakes from Billy (again!!) killed off chances for us. However in the last 10 of the first Everton started to pile on the pressure again and came even closer to scoring after Bainesy’s marvelous free kick struck the bar.

The second half came and Moyesy made the decision to take off Billy who had played garbage in the first half and replace him with 17 year old Ross Barkley. Everton went straight into the second half putting the pressure on again but unfortunately the tiredness of some of players began to show and it seemed that despite the better chances coming for Everton the general possession rate was probably 50/50. The Blues did try and push for a goal by bringing on two strikers in Vellios and young Frenchman Magaye Gueye who had a potential penalty shout near the end only for it to be dismissed (and in fair rightly so as he looked to be going to the ground before any contact was made) but unfortunately just lacked that extra bit of class to push Utd’s back line, even with 6 minutes added time (due to the linesman having to be subbed with the 4th official because he had cramp HA!)

So a disappointing result for the Blue’s but definitely not one to kick and scream about. We played well, but we just couldn’t break the current champions down and just lacked the consistency and that extra kick to get past their solid defence. It’s the Geordies away next, I hate the Geordies, you’ll discover why later this week, but hopefully we can go to their massive soup kitchen on the hill next week and play like we did against Utd and maybe walk away from a ground that hasn’t been favoured by us in recent years with all 3 points.

STATS & FACTS

My man of the match: Coleman (didn’t stop running throughout and created some great chances)

Attendance: 35,494

Squad: Howard, Hibbert, Jagielka, Heitinga, Baines, Coleman, Fellaini, Rodwell, Bilyaletdinov (Barkley), Osman (Velios), Saha (Gueye)

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Filed under 2011/12, Everton, Premier League